Do as I say...

I blogged before about sexting. It's unfortunately something that continues to happen and it's very sad when you hear about teens doing it since it has the potential to have so many negative and long-ranging consequences. There have been several young teenage girls in my practice who have been involved in sexting. In general, the parents are horrified but the girls themselves, while embarrassed about being caught, don't understand what is so wrong. And to be honest, it's getting harder and harder to teach a kid why taking naked (or half-naked pics) of yourself and sending them out into the electronic world is a bad idea when people who are only a couple of years older than you can win prizes like a home theater system for doing the exact same thing.

And we wonder why our kids are becoming so messed up.

It makes me ill.

So, there is a group on Facebook called "If you can't afford to tip your server 20%, DON'T GO OUT TO DINNER." Being curious, I checked out the page. Unsurprisingly, there were complaints from servers about being stiffed on tips (which, yeah, they have every right to complain about), but also a lot of servers stating that they should receive 20% tips regardless of their level of service because 1) They need the money and/or 2) They shouldn't be penalized if they are having a bad day.

Wha?

I worked as a hostess in high school and as a server after high school and in college. I know what it is like to bust your ass serving obnoxious patrons who have enough money to buy alcohol and desserts, but somehow leave a tip that is nothing. It sucks. Really, it sucks. I can recall being stiffed on tips when I know I gave very good service. But, I also understood it came with the job description. It sucks, but it is what it is.

That said, I have two problems with this concept that servers (or anyone in a service industry where there is tipping) should expect a certain tip regardless of quality of service. A tip is synonymous with gratuity; according to the dictionary, the definition of gratuity is: "a gift or reward, usually of money, for services rendered." If you want a good tip out of me, there had better be service rendered. I'm not going to tip you well for just showing up and turning oxygen into carbon dioxide, okay? You have to actually do some, I don't know, work! I know there is a lot of behind the scenes stuff that servers do, but if my table has been sitting for over 20 minutes and you still haven't shown up to even say hi (much less take a drink order), don't expect a good tip! When I was a server and I was in the weeds, I would either ask another server to help me out or ask a manager to give me hand - I never just let a table sit there wondering what was going on. Second, where did the concept of 20% being the expected tip come from? When I was server, 15% was the norm for decent/good service. I don't know how in the last 15 years or so, that percentage has increased to 20%. I've heard some servers state that it is to keep up with inflation, which leads me to believe that they don't understand the concept of percentages.

I will say it unabashedly - I tip 15% for good service and 20% for great service. It's not that I can't afford to tip 20%, it's that I believe it's insane to keep raising the percentage expected. Hey, servers, if you don't want my 15% tip, fine. I'll just stay home, spend my money elsewhere, and not tip you anything. Try paying the bills with no tips and just your crappy attitude.

The Morning After

So, thanks to Scott Brown and the voters of Massachusetts, the Democrats have lost their supermajority in the Senate and now run the risk of not being able to pass important legislation. You know, I hear that, and I have mixed feelings. For six months, the Democrats have had a supermajority and what have they done with it? Did they pass healthcare reform? Did they put in new guidelines so that the banks couldn’t go nuts again and Wall Street wouldn’t cause the same financial mess to happen that we needed to bail them out of? Did environmental regulations that would help clean up our land, water, and air get passed? Other than the stellar nomination and approval of Sonia Sotomayor for the Supreme Court, did any of the major reforms or proposals – the reasons why I walked door-to-door with my toddler, campaigning – get passed?

No.

We’ve had six months of cajoling and coaxing, hand-holding and deal-cutting that has delivered two healthcare insurance reform bills that do the bare minimum to actually reform how healthcare is paid for in this country. There is no public option. There is no cap on how high premiums can go. There is nothing that will slow down the galloping cost of health insurance and health care in general. As someone who has had to deal with insurance claim denials, both as a patient and as a provider, I have been wholly unimpressed with what the Democrats have done with their “supermajority.”

In a way, I think that the loss of Martha Coakley, the loss in Massachusetts, of all places, might be a good thing. Maybe it will be a wake up call to the Democrats in Congress that they need to get their butts in gear and start fulfilling some of those promises of change that they campaigned on. Maybe it will help them realize that all the lobbyist and Wall Street money in the country won’t get them re-elected if the voters are pissed off. Maybe it will make them realize that no Democrat has a “safe” seat and that each of them will actually have to get some work done, some legislation passed, in order to be re-elected.

At the same time, I can’t help but be ticked off that this one special election may mean that the current system of health insurance will stay in place. That the election of Scott Brown means people will continue to lose their ability to access health care if they lose their jobs. That a person could still lose his or her health insurance if he or she has one major illness. That after paying for insurance year after year, when a person actually needs care, it could still be denied so that a pencil pusher somewhere can meet his numbers and get a bonus.

Who needs Al Quaeda? We Americans are doing a pretty bang-up job victimizing ourselves already. Only difference is, instead of doing it for the hope of 70 virgins, we do it for a couple of dead presidents.

Pants on Fire

Ok, ok, ok. So, on Christmas Day, some Al-Quaeda nut tried to cause an explosion on a Detroit-bound jet using explosives he smuggled in his underpants. As is the case with most ideas pulled out of one's ass *ahem* the plot did not quite go as planned, and the bomber merely managed to light himself on fire. Not the best situation, to be sure, and definitely something to take a closer look at, but, as usual, TSA and the government are overreacting. Man tries to smuggle explosives in underpants?!? Time for virtual strip searches for all! He went to the bathroom in order to get the explosives out of his crotch? No potty breaks in the last hour! So, now, you have to take your shoes off, can't take more than 3oz of liquids through security, get virtually strip-searched, and have to have a full bladder (or worse) for the last hour of your flight (a flight, which, more than likely, is over-crowded, late, and over-priced).

Come fly the friendly skies?

You know, before more knee-jerk regulations go into place, how about trying this: enforce the regulations already on the books. The alleged bomber, Umar Abdulmutallab, had his British visa revoked in May 2009 - what did they know that we didn't (and should have known)? The man's father went to the American embassy in Nigeria in November with concerns that his son had become radicalized and might do something violent - why wasn't the bomber's visa revoked at that time, or, at the very least, re-evaluated? This isn't a case of the terrorists getting smarter, it's a case of the US Department of Homeland Security and TSA remaining ignorant. And, like the sheep we are, Americans are in an all-fire hurry to give up what little rights we have left in order to "feel" safe while traveling.

The terrorists are winning. The Constitution and the Bill of Rights are, with each passing airline incident, becoming more and more passe.

Here's a radical idea, though, folks. Instead of everyone saying "Baaa" why not say "WTF TSA?!? Do your jobs!!!"